Blue Sanctuary

Drifting away I feel lonely inside the crowd. Can hear silence in spite of the screaming voices around me. I wanna run away from this sign of emptiness that is now so powerful within my heart. I wanna push away from these walls that are suffocating me. I gotta pull away in able to soothe this fear that’s attacking me. Don’t you ask me if I’m strong! I’m still here in front of you!!! Look at me! See how I’ve tried my best to face you with nothing but this strange truth that I lay before you. I’m not pretending to be who you want me to be. I bare myself and let you see me entirely as who I am. You have seen me being weak and hoping that it makes you stronger. I have strength hidden in my soul. I just don’t know how to pull it up yet. I may be out of balance. Not knowing where I should stand if I look through my eyes. So let me close them and see through my compassion where I should be going. I’ve lied and denied to myself that I will never need someone like you to be there. But see how m

March 28 2006 ALTERED Trapped through years in darkness of pain; Drowned myself for the truth I’ve gain. Feared to understand life in vain; For peace trade my soul in bargain. Reckon the nights you’ve tortured me; Borrow my eyes so you could see. Now torn and altered who to be; Hush, blamed no one but destiny. Then to save you was to hurt you; Wake up from dream you’ve fallen through. We’re both weaker more than we knew; Stray again you shall never do. If fragile I’m broken forever; Now hold me though hardship was over. Wounded and to be healed is never; By love I was driven and altered. I’m afraid to see what I’ll be; If you’ve finally shattered me! Driven by the past I was. Scarred eternally I am. Through battle I survived. Past is what makes me to be me. Who I am that's what I’m gonna find. I blame no one for the pain. But I am inspired by all events, Great weakness is where you pull your strength from. By

When two people felt the same way, It’s called “falling in love” they say. With a ‘yes’ everything could start, And give each other their hearts. The very special moment that they will keep, Is their first kiss that made them fall deep? They could never let the whole day ends, Without holding each other’s hand. Hours and days would seem so long, Being apart would make them feel wrong. They could give up forever for one touch, They can’t stand missing each other that much. When jealousy is so hard to express, It’s one thing to make them depressed. Misunderstanding builds a fight, The way out is holding each other tight. It gives strength for what they feel, Give and take would make it real. It changed me when I started to fall, I believe relationship is a wall. I never knew you were on the other side, When I met you there’s nothing to hide. You broke a part of your wall to let me in, You erased the one inside to make me win. I won’t build

Foolishly childhood years; Ignored meaning of tears. Those neglected sorrows; Became a flame that grows. Craved to stay innocent, Wished life remain decent. Too much pain with a smile; Worth living for a while. Greatest weapon was love; Coz it was all I have. Problems were like raindrops, Or nightmares in quick naps. Why would I love the past? (Coz) It's the story of us. Our rise and fall through time, Simple triumph was the prime. Past makes us who to be, Depression inspires me. In the past where I dwell; Held tales for me to tell. Tragic as it may seem; Written into a dream. Treasured past reveals me, Much more than what you see. A poem I wrote last March 26 2006 I dedicate this piece to my family. And to all the people who stepped in and out of my life.